Looking Out
For Number 1
From Where You Are To Where You Want To Be
To
succeed in looking out for number one, there are a number of
hurdles to clear. Each hurdle has the ability to stop a
person being successful in their quest to maximize the
pleasure in life. Each hurdle has its own little twists and
turns. Yet, ultimately, when all the hurdles are cleared, a
person can maximize their pleasure and satisfaction. Life
becomes something that can be lived whole heartedly, instead
of simply going through the motions.
There are a number of
theories, signals and obstacles associated with these
hurdles, which will be addressed later in the article.
THE
PERSPECTIVE HURDLE
Clearing the perspective hurdle means getting yourself and
your problems into proper focus with respect to the big
picture. When problems are magnified beyond their relative
merits, you lose the ability to cope rationally.
THE
REALITY HURDLE
To
clear the reality hurdle, you must be a realist. A realist
bases life on facts and dislikes anything imaginary,
impractical, theoretical or utopian. Some people confuse
reality with their own likes and dislikes. Clearing the
reality hurdle means correctly perceiving reality and having
the courage to acknowledge it.
THE
PEOPLE HURDLE
Clearing the people hurdle means facing the reality that
people possess potentially harmful traits and learning how
to spot these. The energy used in hassling can instead be
used in attracting people who will add happiness. People can
be your greatest pain and your greatest joy.
Rational means basing words and actions on reason and logic.
Since reason and logic are relative terms, rationality can
only be determined ultimately by long-term results. A
rational person achieves his goals most of the time. An
irrational person strays from the main point and constantly
dwells on irrelevancies. A rational person thinks things
through in solitude and then stays on track despite any
emotional arguments used by those around him. That takes a
correct perception of reality.
THE
CRUSADE HURDLE
Clearing the crusade hurdle means maintaining control over
your actions and refusing to relinquish control to the
desires and whims of any group. Do your own thing. Refuse to
be swept along by a herd instinct, the rhetoric of absolute
moralists, or slogans.
The
characteristics of crusades are:
-
Relevant facts get distorted so only one side of the
picture is put forward.
-
There is an emphasis on the future, not the present.
-
There is a high degree of structure creating an illusion
the crusade is a living entity in its own right.
-
Intimidation through slogans and conformity is present.
-
The crusade becomes an end in itself and never gets
around to real world achievement.
The
crusade is willing to use force to achieve its objectives.
THE
FINANCIAL HURDLE
Clearing the financial hurdle means succeeding in a rational
effort to achieve whatever degree of financial success you
want without making life a misery in the process. It
ultimately means having the financial resources to be able
to act out of choice rather than necessity in most areas of
your life.
The
players in the world of the finance hurdle are:
1.
Schmexerpts
These
are non-experts who can list every reason something cannot
be done. Never give schmexperts the time of day. Avoid
unsolicited advice like the plague. Analyze the facts at
your disposal, take into account the opinions of people you
respect and then go forward expecting the worst, hoping for
the best and prepared to handle whatever happens.
2.
Competitors
Every
genuine competitor will be different. Count only on the fact
that each competitor will act in their own best interests.
Intimidation is the name of the game. If you recognize
intimidation for what it is, you’ll be fine. Never be
intimidated by someone’s bank balance - that has nothing to
do with integrity.
3.
Legalman
Legalman takes his cut regardless of whether you win or lose
in any business transaction. In fact, Legalman charges you
fees for creating problems you didn’t even know you had.
Legalman tries to come across as the ultimate expert, but in
reality he’s in on a government protection racket. In
reality, you can actually do everything Legalman charges you
for yourself if you choose not to use Legalman.
4.
Government
The
reality is that the government is your chief adversary when
it comes down to making money. Never lose sight of the fact
the government plays for keeps with guns and soldiers.
The
government has no life of its own. Its actions are directed
by the small group of people who are in power at the time.
How can they possibly know what’s good for you? How can they
act in your best interests if they’ve never even met you? If
what the government has to offer is so good, why do they
need to use the threat of force to get people to pay their
share?
Try to
keep a low profile and avoid drawing the attention of the
government. As far as possible, protect your assets in such
a way that they can’t be touched by the government. Weigh up
the risks involved and balance them against the potential
penalties when deciding how to approach the government
issue.
5. The
Invisible Player: Murphy’s Ghost
He’s
waiting out there somewhere to trip you up whenever you
start bragging about what you’re going to do. Always work on
the principle that everything will take longer than you
expect, cost more than you’ve budgeted, is never as easy as
it appears and if anything can go wrong, it will at the
worst possible moment.
THE
FRIENDSHIP HURDLE
Clearing the friendship hurdle means establishing
value-for-value relationships or friendships with the people
of your choice so your life can be made better because of
those friendships.
You
can’t be everything to yourself. Friendships help you
maximize the joys of life. With all their inherent problems,
you still need people to share the good moments with. In
fact, in the final analysis, there are a lot of very good
people out there who can add value to your life.
THE
LOVE HURDLE
Clearing the love hurdle means finding the Real Thing. It
means living each moment to the fullest, with your mind
unclouded by visions of the past or the future. It means
filling each other’s needs and keeping your scales balanced.
It all adds up to pleasure, the ultimate aim of looking out
for no. 1.
Lovers, like friends, are people to whom you’re attached by
affection. However, with lovers, there’s an indefinable
physical attraction added. This attraction relies more on
personal taste than any external scale.
Most
people feel lonely when they are not in love. However, there
are some dangers if you let those feelings of loneliness get
out of control, namely:
1.
You become vulnerable to making ‘‘scared money’’ decisions
-the type of decision you would never make if you weren’t
feeling lonely.
2.
If you equate aloneness with loneliness, then you’ll never
really be able to fall totally and madly in love. You can’t
really fall in love if you are panicked about being alone.
There
is no other facet of life in which patience and self
discipline have the potential to pay greater dividends than
in the field of love.
To
know what you’re looking for in love, you begin by being
brutally honest about yourself, and what you most want out
of life. You can only think about this when your intellect
and not your emotions are in control. Remember above all
else, your future happiness does not depend on any one
specific person. You do need a lover in your life, but not
any particular lover. Thinking that there’s only one person
who can fit the bill only adds to the pressure you already
feel.
THE
STARTING LINE
By
clearing all the hurdles, you haven’t reached the end.
You’ve only come to the starting line. It’s the beginning of
a rational life where rational dreams have a way of coming
true and generating vast amounts of pleasure and good
fortune.
Life
can be a journey in which the pleasures far outweigh the
pains. This doesn’t happen by accident, only if you work at
it. In fact, more than effort alone, it takes the courage to
change, patience, self-discipline and a willingness to pay
the price of whatever you’re after.
Never
lose sight of the fact that Murphy’s ghost is waiting out
there to trip you up sooner or later. Be prepared to
tolerate some failures along the way. If you are
aggravatingly upbeat and even pleasant when things go wrong,
even Murphy’s ghost will eventually respect you and leave
you to get on with a life of pleasure.
Remember, the clock doesn’t start running when you take off;
it’s already running.
Follow this link to view
theories,
obstacles and signals discussed in
Looking Out For Number 1.
‘‘The end for which we all more or less strive is happiness.
Our differences in behavior are due to different notions of
what happiness is.’’
--Louise Ropes Loomis
‘‘A
rational man never leaves his interests at the mercy of any
one person or single client. He may need clients, but not
any one particular client. He may need customers, but not
any one particular customer. He may need a job, but not any
one particular job.’’
--Ayn Rand
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